I couple of people of commented to me over the last few months that they find me quite quiet – which I completely agree with, however I was starting to worry that what they actually thought was that I was boring.

I admit that I am not a good conversationalist and I do struggle with small talk generally.  I find it hard to talk about myself to other people that I don’t know very well and it’s not to do with shyness it’s to do with how I feel people will think about me.

I’m generally a crowd pleaser and I enjoy making people happy, I’m not really one of these people that claim that they don’t care what people think of themselves because I genuinely do care how people see me.  I like making people laugh and hearing all their news but I generally don’t go into too much detail about myself or what I’m up to as I get embarrassed when the spotlight is on me.

A couple of years ago the Thursday girls said that I wore too much beige and black and I sat on the fence  too much when it came to voicing my opinions about situations/people/arguments and I totally agreed with them.  I generally kept my mouth shut in situations where I felt things were about to erupt (with them or with other people) so I made the silly decision at that time  to try and change myself to become a bit more opinionated and vocal in arguments and discussions instead of being boring and diplomatic – and do you know what – I have seen absolute no benefit in this and I have ended up having more heated debates and arguments with people since then which I don’t feel has done me any favors at all.

A prime example of this was in New York with the girls last year when J kicked off because she was drunk and instead of leaving her to rant in the street I decided to try and reason with her and we ended up having a massive argument there and then.  Luckily we are still good friends but I still haven’t really forgiven her in my heart for how she reacted and how she failed to apologise to everyone the next morning.

Anyway I have decided that I am going to get myself back on my fence, remain out of all this intense gossip that goes on with my friends, steer clear of arguments and dilemmas and stick to being me!

So far on the front I have:

The Pig in Brockenhurst

The Fat Duck in Bray

The Jetty, Christchurch

Le Gavroche, London

Burgh Island, Devon

The Ice Hotel, Norway

I haven’t added any images to the back yet although I was desperately searching for a image on line of a multi coloured top that Brix (the fashion expert) was wearing on This Morning on Friday – it was lovely!

Cleaning the windows (however it’s raining today so there’s an excuse) I really think I should have a topless 20 something year old hunk to do them for me (or even Nick would do)

Cleaning the oven (need to go to Lakeland and purchase their oven cleaner as it’s meant to be very good)

Cleaning the car inside and out (thinking of taking it to the nice Polish men who have a car cleaning station around the corner from where I work but Nick won’t allow and says I should do it myself) – sexist or not I think it’s a man’s job myself  (along with cleaning the outside of windows)

De-cluttering some kitchen cupboards – one of them is the full of plastic containers that we really don’t use and bugs me every time I open it.

Sewing 4 new buttons on Sophie’s school coat – one of them came off and I couldn’t find a good match so will have to replace them all – hate, hate, hate sewing!

This is my first week working one day a week and if I have to fill the rest of my time with boring domestic duties every week then  I’m soon going to go mad!

However on the plus side I am finding that the extra time to go to the gym has seen me definitely lose weight over the last few days. I’m also sticking to a low carb/fat diet at the moment  and although I’m not weighing myself I’ve lost inches as my clothes are feeling a lot more comfortable now.

I’m loving white egg omelettes

So there are definite benefits of working less and I should just try and enjoy it as it’s not going to last for long!

My mum never minded loads of children being in our house (same can’t be said about my dad) so everyone always used to congregate at our house after school, at weekends (except for Sundays when we used to go to Sunday school in the morning and a family walk in the afternoon) and all through the holidays.

We used to have a long garden with a disused piece of  land at the bottom of the garden.  My parents were very good at letting us run riot around the garden and we used to dig a den at the bottom of the garden in the school holidays.

This den was a series of trenches about two feet deep that we used to then cover in corrugated iron and mud and use it as a look out or hiding place. We used to spend all our days digging this den out (or so it seemed) and we must of been absolutely filthy for most of the holidays, but I remember it being so much fun and it certainly used to fill the days.

I’m very skeptical when it comes to make up and beauty products and I tend not to be sucked into all these so called “miracle products” as I am a firm believer that a lot of the time the signs of aging are:

a) genetic

b) related to general health

c) governed by lifestyle choices

d) inevitable

Anyway in my cupboard I came across a small package of Clarins products that a friend had given to me a few months ago.  Loads of my friends bang on about Clarins but I’ve never really felt the need to try the products as they are, in my opinion, quite pricey.  There was a mini set of three lotions and the first one I applied was an eye contour gel.

Now I do suffer with black puffy bags under my eyes which I hate so I smothered some on and read up on the next product that I was going to use.   When I looked back in the mirror a couple of minutes later ready to apply the serum I was amazed at how the dark shadows and puffiness under my eyes had faded!

I applied the rest of the creams as instructed and then my make up as normal and received two compliments at the school gates when I collected the children  of how well I looked!

So I’m now convinced that the eye contour gel  has done wonders for my face and have been completely sucked in by the Clarins range so much so that I’m going to bang on about it to my friends tomorrow afternoon when we meet for drinks in the Captains Club!

I wonder how much of this I will need on Sunday morning!

Just before Christmas one of my friends was drunkenly telling me that she had, on the previous night, in her words “pulled an amazing guy”.  Anyway as the story transpired he was a married ex-pilot who lives around the corner from us and I know his wife fairly well.

My friend who had met him had sworn me to secrecy over the whole thing once she realised I knew him and his wife,  and begged me not to tell a sole (especially to my friend G as she lives down the same road as him) as she didn’t want to be responsible for any marriage breakdowns (yes I know – she should of thought of that before she took him back to her house).

G and I tell each other most things over a coffee – it’s part of the nature of our friendship – however on this occasion I decided to keep my mouth well and truly shut as I didn’t want to become entangled in the sordid affairs of my friends.

Anyway a over the weekend my friend G phoned to tell me she had some major gossip and I wouldn’t believe what she had heard about one of my friends and someone else I knew and that I must not breath a word to anyone ………and so it transpires the story is out – not sure if my other friend knows yet but thank god it wasn’t me doing the gossiping!

Variety is definitely the spice of life!

……….going to get back in shape!   I went to the gym this morning and was planning to do a legs, bums and tums class followed by a session in the gym but felt so out of shape and unfit I only managed the first session.  I was looking in the mirror in the class at myself and could see a real change in my shape – very pear shaped now with a very wobbly tummy – so I’m really going to have to knuckle down and focus on my eating and exercise.  The diet has started this week – I haven’t weighed myself as I never do but I have measured myself so I am hoping to lose a few inches before I brush off my bikinis!

……….going to try and invest a bit more time on myself.  I know that I spend a long time in the gym when I’m back on track but feel I don’t spend as much time as I need to on other things such as hair and make up.  My beauty regime is very simple – wash with a beauty wash and moisturise  in the  morning and evenings but I don’t do other things like exfoliate and body brush and use body and  hand creams etc which are now probably more important as I get older.

………going to drink less.  I say it every year and I don’t think I drink excessively at all but I do need to cut back the amount I drink when we are socialising – I had two major hangovers last year that saw me bed-bound for most of the day and I certainly don’t want to repeat that this year – I need to have a more mature approach to the joys of alcohol!

…….going to take up a new hobby/interest.  I have always fancied cake decorating and photography so may look into a day workshop in either of the above.  I am also stuck in a ruck when it comes to family meals and now I will have more time on my hands as I am working less at the wholesalers I may try to introduce new foods to our mealtimes.   I am also making sure that we sit down as a family at mealtimes over the weekends as we don’t in the week due to various sports activities that we do individually in the evenings.

…….going to de-clutter my wardrobe.  I have so many clothes that I hang onto for years on end and never really wear for  various reasons such as – I like the pattern/fabric/design/make, I will one day fit into them, it may come in handy, it holds a memory from the time when I brought it etc.   I am going to try and invest my money in good quality clothes that will not date and will generally look good with most things.   I seem to have a small collection of hats and silk scarfs which I generally don’t wear but just can’t part with – I just like looking at them so maybe I will make more of an effort to wear them this year.

………..going to watch more films.   I never get a chance to watch many films as Nick isn’t a fan of sitting and watching films and neither are the children (unfortunately having a girl and a boy means we rarely see eye to eye on what films we see) but I love films and feel I have missed out on so many great ones over the years.

……….going to keep up-to-date with my Blog!

This year we are looking forward to losing weight and getting fit.  Nick has already completed two bike cycles in the last 3 days – one 11 mile and one 20 mile in preparation for his charity (whoops I mean jolly) bike ride in France in June.   This seems to have cost as much as my flight to New York last year so far and he is still on about buying new gear (he was looking at bike shoes yesterday online and told me prices started from £40 and went up to £400 – as if any shoes would be coming into this house that cost £400 and didn’t have a Jimmy Choo label on them).
We have (I think) ruled out a summer holiday this year as Nick has his 40th Birthday Party in July and with (as usual) an endless amount of decorating that always seems to need doing funds just won’t stretch.

We have already a few nice breaks lined up – we are going to Cornwall with some old friends of mine and their children in March,

Round Island with some of the school lot in August

Camping with G at some point

and a family holiday to St Vincent in October which looks amazing.

There was also talk of a barge holiday for the weekend in the school holiday but I think we will be cramming in too much over the summer holidays if we take that on as well as we need to be around to host students for a lot of the time.

My working week has been dramatically cut down to 1 day a week from January 16th which will mean that I will have more time on my hands to get into shape for the summer and plan to blitz my body into shape over the coming months. Nick gave me some personal training sessions for Christmas which I will take in the beginning of February  which will give me a bit of time beforehand to get into an exercising routine.

I plan to be as fit as I can by the summer as I hate this sluggish feeling I have at the moment – unfortunately the children are off school until next Monday so it can’t really start until then – however I’m planning to go to circuits tonight – wish me luck!

Christmas is just around the corner now and the children have broken up from school and are soooo excited that I don’t know what to do with them – they are both jumping around like mad things at the moment.  Sam made me promise yesterday that Father Christmas was real – which I did with my fingers crossed so I think it will be another year at least until he doesn’t believe in him.

All my presents have been brought and wrapped and it’s just the food shopping, cooking and cleaning that will need to be done at the end of the week.

Tomorrow I am taking the children to see Jack and The Beanstalk at the Pavilion which will probably make them even MORE excited!

and the rest of the week will be spent cooking and cleaning and trying to calm the house down before the arrival of my parents on Saturday (Christmas Eve).

……..thinking of my New Years Resolutions – don’t really have any in particular, however I would like to tone up and drop a dress size and try to look the best I can by the time it’s N’s 40th in July (he’s doing the same).

………finishing off Christmas shopping – nearly there just a couple more to get, however the rest are all wrapped and ready to go!

…….baking and decorating Delia’s Waitrose Christmas Cake – I’m not a fan but this actually tastes quite good (I tried a slither from the side after it came out of the oven).

…….looking forward to Christmas – my favorite thing is spending time with the family.  It never really feels like Christmas until either my parents arrive at our house or we arrive at theirs.

……..struggling to find a dress that looks any good on me (still have a few more holiday pounds to get rid of and only 2 more days until our school Christmas party) – I may have to resort to trousers/jumpsuit!

……….enjoying extra time at home now I’ve reduced my hours and just kept to working 2 full days.  Everything at home seems more organised and relaxed and I get to spend more time with the children after school doing things together like playing games or reading to them.

……….eating – vegetable curry most lunchtimes and evenings – although today I met G at Cafe Riva and enjoyed sharing a portion of chips and nachos – yummy!

……….reading – The Confession by John Grisham – I was given it last year for Christmas and haven’t got round to reading it until now!

……….watching – our Christmas messages from Santa on email (Portable North Pole)  N did ones for the kids saying they were good but that Sam had to try more foods and Sophie had to get to the toilet in time if they wanted their presents – but mine said that I farted in bed and was naughty so wasn’t getting much this Christmas (S was a bit concerned for me I have to say)!